Communication Traits And Styles
Women connect through conversation, while men connection through action, according to Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D. A psychotherapist, in the “Psychology Today” article, “Men, Women, Emotions and Communication.” When a woman wants to talk, she wants to share emotions and thoughts, while a man generally shares ideas, suggestions and facts and avoids talking about feelings, writes Goldsmith. That doesn’t mean that a man won’t talk about his feelings, but he might be uncomfortable while doing so. The Body Speaks. Women use an abundance of non-verbal communication such as making eye contact, gesturing and animated facial expressions, according to psychotherapist Susan Sherwood, Ph.D., in the article, “10 Ways Men and Women Communicate Differently” on Discovery.com. A woman often prefers talking while sitting or standing in a cluster of people where everyone is face-to-face.
A man prefers talking shoulder-to-shoulder in an angled pattern where he and his friends can take in the room. A woman might gesticulate, raise her eyebrows, incline her head and shrug her shoulders during the conversation. The man often prefers relaxed, sprawled pose and keeps the body language and facial expressions more contained, reveals Sherwood. Conversations patterns differ between men and women, according to Tanner. A woman may punctuate the conversation with affirmative noises such as “OK” and “Uh huh” to let you know she is listening. The man prefers to sit quietly and focus on what’s being said. He could interpret the woman’s conversations noises as interruptions and become annoyed.
There are four basic communication styles: passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive and assertive. It’s important to understand each communication style, and why individuals use them. For example, the assertive communication style has been found to be most effective, because it incorporates the best aspects of all the other styles. Jul 06, 2012 The Top Communication Traits of Great Leaders. Alan Hall Contributor. Opinions expressed by Forbes Contributors are their own. I cover investing, entrepreneurial growth.
A woman will talk faster and interrupt more when she is excited, writes Goldsmith, which can leave a man behind or cause him to tune her out. When and Where. A man often talks more at work where he shares ideas, problem-solves and communicates with a purpose, according to the YourTango article, “6 Ways Men and Women Communicate Differently.” A woman most often talks on the phone, at home and in social situations where she shares and nurtures through words. Because the man and the woman spend the bulk of their words in different areas with different purposes, they might not communicate as much when they are together as the woman would prefer, writes Tanner. It can help couples to plan time for nurturing conversation if lack of intimate conversation is causing the woman to feel alone or distanced from her partner.
Why does communication seem to work beautifully at times and fail miserably at others?When communication breaks down, it’s often because the patterns and habits of how we communicate — our communication styles — get in the way.Understanding different communication styles can radically improve the quality of your relationships. That’s because your level of skill in navigating difficult conversations depends on your ability to connect.And if you’re working to develop stronger, better communication plays a key role in shaping a positive culture within your office, home, classroom, and community.Read on to assess which of the four communication styles you tend to use — and learn to communicate more effectively in every interaction. Communication styles and connection.
Our communication styles have the power to build meaningful connections, a crucial aspect of success in any area of life. Here are just a few reasons why we need to connect:. have a positive impact on physical and mental health, while poor social connection has ill effects on well-being. Those who feel connected to others have. People with meaningful connections. Good communication skills and the ability to connect with others and job performance.
builds a strong, healthy family environment.Connection requires conversation, but as I’m sure we’ve all experienced, breakdowns in communication happen. We say something that suddenly sends people running for the hills, hiding under their beds, or ready to start a fight.Meanwhile, other interactions leave us confused and uncertain, like we missed the mark in trying to convey our thoughts and emotions in words.Then those magical moments happen when our interactions bring us closer to one another. We feel mutually understood, recognized, and respected.Meaningful connection is what life’s all about. When we get it right, it’s a game-changer. Behavior Traits Influence Different Communication Styles. Science sheds light on exactly what happens during human interaction. The Social and Neuro Sciences, just to name two, have shown us:.
Over time, people develop relatively stable behavior patterns. People form immediate impressions about others based on verbal and nonverbal behaviors. The way people behave toward one another is determined by their perceptions of each other. The most important dimensions of human behavior are assertiveness and responsiveness.Our behavioral patterns become habitual over time, and may not match our evolving thoughts and emotions. As a result:What we say doesn’t always align with what we mean.Our communication habits often don’t reflect our dynamic thoughts and emotions, giving others the wrong impression of what we want to communicate. These habits affect the way others perceive and respond to us during interactions.At the same time, we also judge the habitual behaviors of others and fail to understand what they want to convey. This process leads to gaps in understanding what another person means.
And it happens quite often.In her book, ®, Judith E. Glaser explains that 9 out of 10 conversations miss the mark.
Meaning, we have an intention when we speak, but our style, our patterns, and perceptions get in the way of the other person picking it up.So how do we ensure what we say aligns with what we mean?Let’s take a closer look at understanding the basic four communication styles, and which one to practice for better conversations. The 4 Communication Styles. People develop verbal and nonverbal behavioral patterns that, over time, become pretty stable. These habits influence how we communicate.Although it’s possible to learn and practice different patterns, the communication styles that most people habitually use are:. Passive.
Aggressive. Passive-aggressive. AssertivePassive CommunicatorsPeople who speak in a passive manner have difficulty expressing themselves and tend to give in to others. Failure to express thoughts and emotions often leads to miscommunication and built-up anger or resentment.You can recognize a passive communicator with the following behaviors:.
Difficulty making eye contact. Inability to say no. Go with the flow type attitude. Poor postureYou may recognize passive communication through phrases like:.
“It doesn’t matter that much.”. “I just want everyone to get along.”Aggressive CommunicatorsAggressive communication takes things to the other side of the spectrum. People who rely on this communication style in the workplace, at home, or among friends tend to dominate the conversation. Words often fall short in accurately describing abstract emotions and dynamic thought patterns.I frequently play a game with business clients to illustrate the limitations of language. Here’s how it works:. I ask everyone to jot down a few notes regarding what comes to their mind when I say one simple word.
I ask the group to not say anything, just jot down the first image or idea that comes to mind. Then I say: Here’s the word – Holiday!. We go around the room, each person describing what their mind’s eye conjured up when they heard Holiday.After 18 years of using this exercise, not once have two people come up with the very same image.We use words all the time to describe abstract, intangible things. Download video one piece full eps sub indo. We ascribe meaning to the words, the sequence, and the timing to describe what stirs within us. But our inner processings, feelings, thoughts, perceptions, attitudes, and so much more remain invisible.It’s difficult to grasp these concepts, let alone express them clearly.
This is why it becomes so important to know ourselves first before we can express what we think and feel to others.Fortunately, self-assessment tools and personality indicators like the DISC profile or can help you better understand yourself. The DISC ModelThe first distinction to make when determining your communication style starts with how you make decisions. Provides an unbiased personality assessment tool that outlines human behavioral patterns.
Over two million people have taken this communication style quiz.Here’s how it works:The DISC model consists of four quadrants, corresponding to the letters D-I-S-C:. Dominance/Driver: Emphasizes results and the bottom line. Influence/Inspirational: Emphasizes relationships and influencing or persuading others. Steadiness: Emphasizes cooperation, honesty, and reliability.
Conscientiousness/Contemplative: Emphasizes competence, quality, and expertise.The DISC profile assessment teaches you a great deal about yourself. Your social style indicates strengths, weaknesses, opportunities for greatness. It can also help you identify your biases, blind-spots, and unfulfilled needs, which often show up as bad behavior.These types of communication style assessment tools develop self-awareness, a key attribute in personal development, healthy relationships, and effective communication skills. The Link Between Communication Style and Success. “To get to the next level of greatness depends on the quality of our culture, which depends on the quality of our relationships, which depends on the quality of our conversations. Everything happens through conversation.”by Judith GlaserExcellent communication skills run hand-in-hand with success.When we reflect on the successful people we know, two characteristics commonly show up.
First, they have a sense of self-awareness and comfort being within their own skin, and a confidence in their sense of their.Second, they often have an above-average means of relating to other people, be that the ability to connect, set people at ease, and communicate in a way that encourages trust.Now that you understand the four styles, it’s time to develop self-awareness and uncover your behavioral tendencies and personal needs. Then, employing assertive communication behaviors, start expressing needs and wants confidently.Whether your goals relate to your job, health, family, or finances, you’ll never get what you want without learning to communicate. Effective communication doesn’t mean talking the loudest, getting the last word, or avoiding conflict.Powerful communication means understanding your needs and learning how to express them clearly — while also valuing the messages you receive from others.Better communication can help you.Start practicing better communication today to improve relationships, encourage mutual success, and build trust.